Living That Surro Life

It's crazy how much and how little has gone by in the month and a half-ish since my last post. I've unintentionally let more time pass by than I would have liked since my last post but things have been fairly busy (as always).

All in all, things have been going very well. About a month ago, the guys were able to make it over to Sioux Falls to see their 20 week ultrasound. This was an absolutely wonderful experience all-around 😊. They were finally able to see first-hand their little girl moving around (and trying to hide). I'm not a terribly sappy person so I apologize in advance, but my heart just swells with happiness seeing their reactions to their baby girl. I can't say this enough but I am beyond excited for them to be able to meet their little one in a few months 💞

During this appointment, we found out that everything was still developing well and she had a healthy little heartbeat as well. She started getting a little shy during the ultrasound and had her hands in front of her face and even started making a motion that looked like she was sucking her thumb. The guys were able to leave the appointment with a small accordion of ultrasound pictures as well as some videos of her moving/her heart beat.

Later that day, we met up again for dinner and they were able to meet my dad and Armin for the first time. My dad, not surprisingly, hit it off quite well with them and I believe they described him as a "riot" with his typical off-beat sense of humor and random stories. I was thrilled (and also not surprised) that Armin got along well with them as well. We were at dinner for a few hours and he was absolutely wonderful through it all and I think him being able to meet the guys in person kind of closed the circle on his curiosity about the baby. I can tell with their interactions with him that they will make phenomenal dads (not that I ever questioned that). It was so nice to catch up with them in person and made me a bit wishy washy (thank you hormones) for them to meet and hit it off with more of my family, particularly Armin.

Since the 20 week ultrasound, we've had one more routine Dr. visit as well as a fetal echocardiogram. Because there is a little more risk involved with IVF pregnancies, we were told this was a routine thing that is done with an IVF pregnancy. This scan basically just focuses on the structure and pumping ability of the heart. Thankfully, I was able to FaceTime the guys during this (typically, Dr. Salama's office has been the only area accepting of FaceTiming during the appointments) and they were once again able to see their little one. I think she even got the hiccups a bit during the ultrasound which was kind of cute to see. As has been the case with everything else, baby girl made it through the echo with a clean bill of health and no concerns from the doctor!

So now here we are, about half way through week 25 and things have been going quite well. Honestly, this has been SUCH a smooth pregnancy. The only symptoms I've had lately are some pretty decent heartburn if I eat too much at once and a fairly early bedtime because I've noticed I tire a little more quickly than normal. I've been lucky to still keep up my running, though my distances have been cut much shorter than normal and my pace has slowed quite a bit which is all A-OK with me. I feel good when I run still but am definitely more cautious with what I feel during my runs to make sure I don't over-do it. I also remember with Armin having periods where he wasn't moving around quite so much which would make me nervous. With this girl, not so much. She is constantly rolling and stretching and sometimes kicking. Yes, she does have down time but for the most part, she is quite a little ball of energy. I've noticed her getting the hiccups every now and then too. She will be one to keep up with for sure!

I've also gotten to the size that people start asking about the baby. Though I am far from ashamed or wanting to hide the fact that I am a proud surrogate for two wonderful dads, I don't feel like explaining the intricacies of this pregnancy with every stranger/patient/well-meaning individual I encounter. That makes for a pretty heavy ice-breaker in my opinion. Typically, people just start out by asking if this is my first (to which I reply that I have a 4 year old of my own) or ask when she is due (much easier to touch on lightly without going into extensive detail 😉). And then there are some times when the conversation simply steers that way anyway and there's no real way to explain this pregnancy without explaining the surrogacy. I have been delighted by mostly positive reactions to essential strangers finding out that I am a surrogate, but still haven't found a non-awkward way to accept the accolades I typically get from people. I'm not doing this for any kind of recognition or sprucing up of my karma - I simply want to give DJ & JP a start to their family and the indescribable experience of being a parent that I cherish myself with being Armin's mother.

Although I do get a majority of positive responses, I have encountered certain questions that make me kind of double take a bit. Some people will ask, almost immediately, how much I'm getting paid to do this. Again, although that is a part of many surrogacy journeys, that is not why I'm doing this. I've also had people ask how I can "give up" the baby once she is born. That is also not what I'm doing. This little girl is 100% her fathers' baby. I usually explain this to others as extreme babysitting. I care about this little girl, look after my own health for the sake of hers and treat this pregnancy as I did with my own child, but in the end she will be with her dads, just as a child care giver would look after a child for the day and send them home with their parents. I sometimes get judging looks with this response but the vast majority of people are accepting and seem to understand. I truly am impressed at how far society has gotten with accepting differences but it also makes me realize how far at least my community has yet to go before this would be less of an oddity.

As per usual, I feel like I've rambled a bit 😅

I'm sure as these last few months start closing in and baby A's arrival gets closer, I will have much more to say. I can't believe we've already gotten to 25 weeks! I know the guys feel the same way (maybe with a little more anxiety preparing for this active little girl). Looking forward to seeing what the rest of this journey has in store for us!

<3

(A bump picture I sent to the guys - Armin had to peep in to say "hi" to them 😊)